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The common questions I get asked everyday, and the answers.
How do we know if we have fear or phobia? Well it is very easy to find that out, and the question you have to ask about your possible fear is, do you avoid anything? The answer to that is probably Yes, if it is Yes, then you do have a fear. How bad is the fear? All fears are bad to the person that has the fear, lets make no mistake about that, but normally what controls how bad it is on a day to day basis is how much you have to avoid it, or think about it. If the fear is something you do not come into contact with too often, then it can be little easier to live with, so it is often the circumstances more than anything else that says how bad it is, or how much it effects your life. An example would be, Fear of snakes Not a nice fear, but avoidable and not really on your mind day to day. Emetophobia (Fear of sick) Very difficult indeed to avoid. So while the fear when in contact, is the same for everyone, the different fears pose different problems the more problems you face, the worse it is. How does a fear start? There are various ways, the most common are: Picking up the fear from a close relative, parents or brother or sister. Having a bad experience when young, or indeed any age. Other things such as bullying and nightmares can also trigger off a fear or phobia. It is important to note that after an initial bad experience the fear can lay dormant for many many years, and then triggered by another one later on in life. It can be something very simple indeed that triggers it all off, and something quite common even, but of course when you are young, seeing or having something happen to you can be very frightening indeed. Why does a fear get worse? At the very beginning of a fear, we start what I will call a database, and that database contains all the thoughts/smells/sights/feelings that go into the fear, that is programmed into the database from day one. Then we have what I will call our radar, and that is programmed to pick up on the thoughts/smells/sights/feelings and if it does, then we become worried, and as time goes on the database just grows, we think of more ways the fear can worry us, we think of different scenarios, other places, as our experience with the fear grows, then the fear grows as well, it gets worse. I am worried what will happen if I overcome my fear. This is quite common the thought of doing something that you are afraid of can be quite frightening in itself, what do we do about that? Well that is quite easy to sort out, if we go back to the fear factors and look at the scores that we have written down, (see how bad is my fear above) we can in fact decide ourselves in other words YOU DECIDE, what fear factor level you would like to reduce to, so you are in control. Lets put it another way... Lets say it is a fear of dogs: Walking into a room with a dog Fear factor 10 Stroking a dog Fear factor 10 Walking across the road with a dog on a lead Fear Factor 5 Now if you decide that you want to buy a dog, then your fear factor level would have to be zero, I would think, but I suggest that probably a step too far, why don’t YOU decide to bring them down to levels that you can cope with. Walking into a room with a dog Fear factor 2 Stroking a dog Fear factor 3 Walking across the road with a dog on a lead Fear factor 0 So they don’t have to be set all the same, obviously you want to set everything back to zero, then of course you can, but the message is, YOU are in control, not me. You decide what you want, what is achievable and what will make a difference to your life. How do you do all of this? Well hypnotherapy is not just help in one particular way, it is a combination of ways that it can help, and the all round combination if done well should enable you to improve very quickly. So it can close down the initial fears, close down all memories and thoughts that worry you, give you confidence that has been done, give you confidence that you can go forward in your life without your fear. It can give you help in certain situations if you feel the feelings coming back. It shows you the way to do this, which is very difficult to do without help, and that is all hypnotherapy is, help to see the way to do something. So very simply, it shows you how. What is the best thing to do now? You can contact me if you wish, that is direct contact to me, on mail@hypnotherapy-online.co.uk and I will give you a very fair assessment on your fear and talk it through with you. Or you can order a personal CD, which will contain everything that you need, you will only need one. That can be ordered on the Personal Page and more details about that are on the page. |
Tel: 01305 750736
Email : enquiries@hypnotherapy-online.co.uk
